very briefly considers telling her he's actually like 35, but considering how she reacted the last time he mentioned he was dead, he decides against it. THAT'S PROBABLY A JOKE THAT WOULD TURN THIS CONVERSATION SOUTH.]
I know! I've made my bed in it already, just in case my hip pops out of place and I can't stand properly anymore. Could happen any day, you know?
[GOODBYE BECK. He just POINTS AT HER with dramatic accusation, since this whole damn room is just a hammy stage now, apparently.]
You won't! I'll have you run out of this town for being the worst possible merchant chiropractor thief in the night that we've seen this side of the sea!
I can't believe I'm seeing this cruel side of you for the first time over needing to have my old man hip bones put back into place... Terrible! I can't bear it!
[A single hand sticks up over the side of the bed like a ZOMBIE RISING FROM THE EARTH... and starts patting around in search, uselessly poofing the comforter.]
Oh? I might? Think twice! I already have! Haha, don't underestimate me.
[SUCCESS. Once her arm is within reach, he'll move his hand over and pat it a few times.]
Oh! Well. If I could pay in watermelons from the start, you should have mentioned it! That's fine, then - I won't take action against your fine establishment.
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[She’s just going along with it.]
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very briefly considers telling her he's actually like 35, but considering how she reacted the last time he mentioned he was dead, he decides against it. THAT'S PROBABLY A JOKE THAT WOULD TURN THIS CONVERSATION SOUTH.]
I know! I've made my bed in it already, just in case my hip pops out of place and I can't stand properly anymore. Could happen any day, you know?
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[that
may have come out wrong.]
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Thank god! I can pop my hip out of socket any time I want, now!
[WHY WOULD HE WANT TO.]
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Just keep in mind I charge per incident.
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[WHAT IS SHE EVEN CHARGING IN, DICK CHIPS??]
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[cruel]
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[THROWING A HAND AGAINST HIS FOREHEAD. His fragile constitution... can't tolerate this...]
Terrible! Even the cheapest of vendors are willing to give better deals than that to strangers!
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Everyone has to make a living somehow.
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There's making a living, and then there's robbery! Guess which side of the line you fall on!
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[It seems like she's following his overdramatic example, because she's definitely falling backwards onto the bed as she says that, sighing deeply.]
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You won't! I'll have you run out of this town for being the worst possible merchant chiropractor thief in the night that we've seen this side of the sea!
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[WHAT CHILDREN]
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[WHAT CHILDREN]
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[She says, definitely not stifling a laugh at all.]
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[He just
dramatically collapses to the floor.]
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Careful. You might throw your hip out.
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Oh? I might? Think twice! I already have! Haha, don't underestimate me.
[WHY.]
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[She's just watching his hand do its thing.]
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I know! I should be rewarded for my talents, but instead, I'm just cheated out of my money. Is that not the saddest thing?
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At least you have enough watermelons to cover all my fees.
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Oh! Well. If I could pay in watermelons from the start, you should have mentioned it! That's fine, then - I won't take action against your fine establishment.
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[She says, as though this is an accepted part of Watermelon Sect Lore.]
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Of course! How else would we have remained strong for over four hundred years?
[It's... it's an old sect now... Old watermelon money.]
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[Here they are, with him touching her arm from his place on the ground, still being fools.]
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